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Former Prostitutes Revere Preachers and Deacons as ‘Best’ Clients

Former Prostitutes Say Preachers and Deacons Were Some of Their Best Clients

With the recent scandals that have been exposed from predominantly African American churches within the past 1-2 years, “good” pastors are having a difficult time proving that church is still a safe haven for those who seek refuge from their tribulations and want to better their lives. Author Deborrah Cooper’s The Black Church: Where Women Pray and Men Prey,  just made their argument even more challenging. The book sheds light on how the black church is guilty for keeping black women single. In light of the topic, former prostitutes at We’ve Been There Done That, a non-profit organization in Houston, TX, that reforms ex-prostitutes and drug addicts, gave their perspective on the book- drawing from their own personal experiences with preachers and deacons at the church.

The founder of the organization, Kathyrn Griffin, said preachers and deacons were some of their “best” clients. A member of her organization, Rebecca, agreed with Kathryn stating, “There’s been a few clients that I’ve had in there (the church).  They weren’t priests but they were organized in the church as brothers.  Those were some of the best clients I had.” Another member named Alicia said one of her “regulars” was very active in the church. “He’d give me money. He’d give me dope. He’d give me anything that I wanted. I stayed at his house before.  He has a room at his house where girls come over and get high,” she said. All of the women said they can relate to author Deborah Cooper’s perspective of the church.

Many critics argue that rigid beliefs constructed in the black church are keeping black women from finding their husband. I believe that’s a good argument because the churches I’ve frequented are typically filled with women- most who are single, never been married, and are mothers. It seems to me that preachers conveniently tip-toe around the conversation of premarital sex and out-of-wedlock childbirths, while focusing on telling women why they shouldn’t put up with their “sorry” man.

Do you think the black church is keeping black women single?

 

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47 Responses to Former Prostitutes Revere Preachers and Deacons as ‘Best’ Clients

  1. Nathaniel Brown Jr Reply

    July 19, 2012 at 9:16 am

    How are woman being kept single? Are they NOT allowed to date? Are they not allowed to have relationships? Are they not allowed to choose for themselves? In addition, where are the fathers?

  2. Bernice Smith Reply

    July 19, 2012 at 10:16 am

    It’snot the church, it’s the lack of men…that’s my belief.

  3. head Reply

    July 19, 2012 at 10:36 am

    I’ve been to every library I know of and the only way you can get that book is to buy it (dam) dont have funds to buy it but would love to read it.

    • Derrick Reply

      July 19, 2012 at 3:25 pm

      Why spend money on the book and you get church gossip right here on this site!

      I AIN’T BUYING NOTHING, because I already know these screachas ain’t nothing but modern day church pimps…male and female!

      LOOK AT THE FEMALE SCREACHA, WHO SET HER HOUSE ON FIRE, WITH ANOTHER FEMALE! Do the math!

      THE DUMB BYTCH LEFT ON THE SECURITY CAMERA AND GOT BUSTED!

    • Derrick Reply

      July 19, 2012 at 3:33 pm

      @head:

      Why spend money on the book and you get church gossip right here on this site!

      I AIN’T BUYING NOTHING, because I already know these screachas ain’t nothing but modern day church pimps…male and female!

      LOOK AT THE FEMALE SCREACHA, WHO SET HER HOUSE ON FIRE, WITH ANOTHER FEMALE! Do the math!

      THE DUMB BYTCH LEFT ON THE SECURITY CAMERA AND GOT BUSTED!

  4. shelley420 Reply

    July 19, 2012 at 10:58 am

    What kinda church yall go too? We don’t have those issues at my church. No church is perfect but that kinda mess ain’t happening in a place where there is true Godly Leadership. All I know is you will find whatever you’re looking for….good or bad wherever you are.

    God pours water on ground that is thirsty…if you’re thirsty for the Word you’re good….if you’re thirsty for something else….then u get what your hand calls for.

    • Scott W Trent Jr Reply

      July 28, 2012 at 9:54 am

      HA, you don’t know your church, you are blind, there is more then one brother in that group who is getting it on with at “ho” and probably more then one who is getting it on with another man, probably a man right in the group….. keep on being blind! OR I can come there and point “them” out to you!!!

    • Michele Reply

      July 28, 2012 at 3:45 pm

      A-to the-men!!! Amen!!!

  5. Ausar Nebankh Reply

    July 19, 2012 at 12:21 pm

    Oh the poor angelic innocent females who is doing all of the praying, and the bad mean wolfs are doing the preying, just like in the fairy tales. Oh My! Little riding hood and the big bad wolfs have nothing on this tall tale. or tail.

  6. Harold Michael Harvey Reply

    July 19, 2012 at 1:20 pm

    You can request your library to get the book for you to read.

  7. Derrick Reply

    July 19, 2012 at 3:22 pm

    If a negroid female let’s a ‘church’ keep her single, than she has lost her Afrikan mind!

    The screacha tells Black women to remain single because those are his ‘ho’s. He’s just like the pimp on the street; he’s protecting his church ‘ho’s. And the street pimp, protects his street ho’s. A ‘HO IS A ‘HO!

    These weak minded negroid females look up to the screacha because he is clean, has a new ride, nice home, expensive clothes and jewLRY, and that draws them to him, just like the pimps, who draw young girls to him with the jewLRY, cars, clothes, etc.

    This is why there are more xtian females going to strip clubs because they are ‘out there’ for the screacha…gettin’ ‘ho’s, so he can bring them into his stable, called the church!

    White people have been psychologically trying to disarm Black people and make them turn off their own minds, ever since we helped them come out of the caves.

    THE CAUCASOID’S RELIGION IS FALSE! THIS IS A MIND GAME

    • blacxkcobra Reply

      July 27, 2012 at 9:10 pm

      That’s what I’m talking bout right there G, and another thing I saw a young black running down the street trying to hold his pants up at the same time, now I’m no rocket scientist but if the young black man would have went to Walmart and maybe brought him a BELT or some SUSPENDEDERS to hold his pants up while he was RUNNING down the street his pants would never fall off, but u have to wonder why some African American Men walk around showing azz like that but u know if a black woman walk around with her pants hanging off her azz she would get label quick, but my uncle told me something long time ago he said u know the most men that can pull the most women are PREACHERS AND POLITICIANS and he was right, just cause someone has a bible in their don’t mean they tell the truth ALL the time

      BLACXKCOBRA//PRINCE OF THA UNITEX STATEZ

      • Scott W Trent Jr Reply

        July 28, 2012 at 9:57 am

        Maybe the “brother” was running cause some one finally “asked” him if he got into that butt and use IT for a while!!! Now the young man knows WHY the britches are LOW, the prison brothers learned a long time ago, how to look dressed while they got a nice piece of a** ! Too bad the young guys of today have NO IDEA what IT means!! SAD!!

    • Beingsensible Reply

      July 28, 2012 at 2:09 pm

      I really feel sorry for you.

  8. torrereese@yahoo.com Reply

    July 19, 2012 at 3:41 pm

    Right on brother Derrick! I wrote a poem once called, “Church House Pimps”, and in the poem, I reference the legendary Pimp, “Iceberg Slim”, whose books I read as a youngster. I like what you said because there is a strong direct correlation between a Pimp and a Preacher; they are both often charismatic, charming, smart, dress well, love material things, attract women in droves, and love money! Plus, they both know their respective books very well, and can use their “Lip” or gift of gab to influence people (especially women) to do what they need them to do.

    I’ve always pondered the issue as to why there are so many women in the church, and so few men, and one of my conclusions has to do with the fact that most real men are turned off by any man, in this case the preacher man, whose major focus are the females. This situation leaves the crooked, corrupt male preacher with little competition from other males whom the women might be interested in, and who share the same religious/spiritual beliefs.

    So, I can identify with these ex-prostitutes who say that church guys were their best customers, no competition, pay-to-play, no residual issues that a regular chick would pose to a brotha, like, commitment, etc.

    Anyway, great article,

    • Derrick Reply

      July 20, 2012 at 7:19 am

      @torrereese:

      Nothing but the Truth!

      When I read the Truth I ain’t scared to give credit where it’s due!

      Peace & Truth

    • Beingsensible Reply

      July 28, 2012 at 2:17 pm

      I suppose there are many churches in the U.S., and some…even many may fall into this category. But I can tell you for absolute sure that as a born-again believer, I have never attended a church that focuses solely on women. In fact, the two that I have been a member of have as many men as they have women as members. It’s sad that we want to categorize all “Black” churches in this way, but we exclude churches of other races/nationalities. Yes, I agree that some of the Black churches in the U.S. are more focused on the prosperity of the Pastor than the well being of the congregation, but it’s up to the members to discern the Word that’s coming forward…is it of God, or is it of man. But I firmly believe that there are good churches in the African American community, and I was fortunate to have found 2 of them. If the average salary of a Pastor in a mega-church is $147,000 which I read either on this blog or in the forwarding note of a friend, then that’s not a whole lot as far as I’m concerned.

  9. torre` Reply

    July 19, 2012 at 3:44 pm

    Right on brother Derrick! I wrote a poem once called, “Church House Pimps”, and in the poem, I reference the legendary Pimp, “Iceberg Slim”, whose books I read as a youngster. I like what you said because there is a strong direct correlation between a Pimp and a Preacher; they are both often charismatic, charming, smart, dress well, love material things, attract women in droves, and love money! Plus, they both know their respective books very well, and can use their “Lip” or gift of gab to influence people (especially women) to do what they need them to do.

    I’ve always pondered the issue as to why there are so many women in the church, and so few men, and one of my conclusions has to do with the fact that most real men are turned off by any man, in this case the preacher man, whose major focus are the females. This situation leaves the crooked, corrupt male preacher with little competition from other males whom the women might be interested in, and who share the same religious/spiritual beliefs.

    So, I can identify with these ex-prostitutes who say that church guys were their best customers, no competition, pay-to-play, no residual issues that a regular chick would pose to a brotha, like, commitment, etc.

    Anyway, great article,

  10. James DeLeon Reply

    July 19, 2012 at 4:17 pm

    Black women are single because of the lack of quality black men to entertain their thoughts and desires. We are the reason that so much wrong blankets our communities because many of us are obsessed with screwing as many women as we can, not taking responsibility with helping to raise children, (should they become pregnant) and not always doing our best to be the protectors of our families by getting the best education afforded to us and using our skills and talents to help uplift each other. Many of us find drugs and alcohol as the way to declare our manhood, and then we get caught up in illegal activities to make money because many of us are too lazy to go to school, seek and education, and try our very best to be better men than our fathers were (if we even know who he is). The fact that I could type that last sentence demonstrates the sad state of affairs with many black men in society today. If getting high, staying drunk, having your pants sag to your ankles are the new benchmarks as what it is to be a man, then just from observing many of the young men and some older one’s too, we are well on our way to completely destroying what is left of our communities because we look and act like idiots and play right into the psyche of some white people that states we will never be anything more, than the slave mentality many of us have subscribed to because it is not important to be seen as responsible, self-loving individuals, who really do care about our communities, and ourselves.

    • Leta Reply

      July 28, 2012 at 9:14 am

      I appreciate your honesty about the black male. Those of you that are the example of what a strong black brother should be take just a few moments out of your day and encourage the younger black males that have lost their way. As a black people we continue to divide and kill each other then blame it on the white man. We must take responsibility for our choices.

    • Scott W Trent Jr Reply

      July 28, 2012 at 9:59 am

      Naw, it’s more then A REASON, there are three: (1) let the white man put black men away or dead, (2) the mothers are not truly raising men in their household, (3) media does not report the truth to the black community!

  11. Deb Cooper Reply

    July 19, 2012 at 7:39 pm

    Hey Maria, thanks for covering this story! :)

    I want to share a couple of things with your readers.

    #1 the book is brand new and is not yet in wide distribution. It’s not even on Amazon and Barnes & Noble.Com yet, that’s how new it is! Therefore it will not be in libraries quite yet – they are usually the last to get books, months after the release. Purchasing at the moment is available only through the website *

    #2 This book is designed for two markets: (a) those that have seen and know for sure, or those who suspect problems and abuses in church but need details on how to know with certainty; and (b) those that are clueless and don’t know that they themselves, or their mother, aunt, sister or girlfriend are being gamed on and abused in church. This is the only source I’m aware of that creates an environment of support and encouragement for men and women to ferret out unethical church leaders.

    The book is not an attack on religion per se, but instead an attack on those that use the principles of religion and Godliness AGAINST believers to get what they want out of them under fraudulent pretenses. The book breaks down in great detail the manipulative words, trickeration, false representation of Scripture and out and out lies that preachers tell female congregants every day of the week.

    The publicity Where Women Pray and Men Prey is getting ALREADY is nothing but an indicator of what’s to come. This book, out less than 30 days, is a classic in the making. I believe it is an investment that you can refer to again and again. This book is not just really about keeping women single (the article the book is based on is however), this book covers church pimp games, cults, sexual abuse, financial games, pastors as sociopaths, church as the new slavery, the 10 step plan to turning a woman into a ‘ho, and lots more.

    Because the games outlined in it apply to church leaders as well as men that a woman might date out in the real world, its applicability is NOT limited to religious women. Even if two or three women are on a strict budget and have to go in and buy the book together, I think it is a purchase that is worth making for your own emotional safety and peace of mind. NO ONE is breaking down the business of churching like I do in this book.

    Again Maria, thank you for covering this important story.

  12. GOD Reply

    July 19, 2012 at 7:54 pm

    Its not the Black Church that keeps Black Women Single, yet its Black Women who ALLOW THE BLACK CHURCH TO FEED THEM DISTORTED PERSPECTIVES that they accept that contributes to them being Unfulfilled. I say unfulfilled rather than single, because I do not wish to contribute to this prevailing belief that being single is something to be ashamed of or BAD. The world is evolving and the church can and has in many ways failed to EVOLVE as well. It continues to subscribe to antiquated perspectives, claiming its GOD when its man’s theoretical interpretation about customs and ideas from a culture 2500 years ago that were doing what we are still doing– trying to make sense out of life. Humans hate uncertainty and ambiguity, yet both are a part of human life and ultimately work to support our development and maturity. I predict eventually the Black Church will become VOID and further irrelevant because most will wake up and see it for what it is a mythological detour for those unable to take full responsibility for their lives.

    • Leta Reply

      July 28, 2012 at 9:18 am

      Excellent perspective!

  13. Taunya Reply

    July 20, 2012 at 1:08 pm

    I grew up going to church with my grandmother. I still love this church, of my home town. I moved to a different city about ten years ago and have not found a church home yet because I have seen so many of these preachers, deacons, whatever, hanging around with these females who either don’t care themselves or just are doing what they feel they have to, to get by. You have married preachers dating women from the congregation and things of that nature, so no, I haven’t found a church home here where I now live. This is why.

  14. Erica Reply

    July 20, 2012 at 1:18 pm

    James De Leon well said.As a single celibate christian woman, it is not the church that has kept me single,it is past experiences(divorce)that has kept me from even thinking of sleeping with someone who is not worth my time, men in and out the church want to be in your drawers without trying to get to know your middle name. I prefer to be by myself than settle for less than, I take care of myself financially so I’m looking for someone who has the moral compass and values that I believe in and is equally yolked. Not a booty call.

    • Rev Bullbone Reply

      July 23, 2012 at 3:54 pm

      Erica, your comments make a lot of sense especially the part about “.. not even thinking about sleeping with someone because men always wanting to be in and out of your draws”. Don’t stay strung out there too long and become desparate (~_o). Being strong only lasts so long then you fall for Deacon Long Dong. It’s inevitable.

  15. DIABLO Reply

    July 20, 2012 at 1:49 pm

    hey if a lot of these black women dint have sych fuck up attitudes maybe they wouldnt be single

  16. 1 Black mans opinion Reply

    July 23, 2012 at 9:50 pm

    It seems no matter what the article is about, we started out in this country as slaves, non of us had any freedom. Not even freedom to marry, ever wonder why we were divided an no two slaves from the same tribe could go to the same farm or Plantation. Ever wonder why Black women marched in the Womans Right to Work Movement? Afterall they had jobs, look at the HELP. And why is it more Black women working on contruction jobs driving trucks ie manual labor jobs “the jobs Black men held” than Black men. And it all starts Sunday morning, your lady wakes up late because yoall got blissed and partied all night, she goes to church and is reminded of the THINGS she don’t have. 1 a man every women in that church LOVES. 2 designer clothes & shoes for every Sunday. His & hers Beemers or Binzees or Rolls Royces and air planes if your last name be Dollar.. How many women wish they could be the called FIRST LADY. If pastor say, you to good for that man, hell you’re gone no questions asked. Now BLACK MEN WERE TAKEN OUT OF THE HOUSE IN THE 70′s & 80′s, by a system that told women you can get a better JOB and a BETTER MAN, so women have been searching, but you found out the brotha in church with you is gay, he likes little boys or he wanna be a PIMP himself just like PASTOR.. Back in the day, when ever you saw a Cadi in the hood you knew it was the Preacher from the CHURCH or the neihborhood PIMP. I see DIVIDE AN CONQUER is working. How long will we keep up the foolishness. We were all close and stronger as a people, when WE ALL HAD the same NOTHING.. If we stand together despite our differences, we could truly be a powerful force. Each 1, teach 1. We haven’t made it over, till WE ALL GET OVER.. all

  17. VoiceOf Truth Reply

    July 27, 2012 at 8:19 pm

    The reason black churches are filled with a large number of single black mothers is because the african american community at large is filled with mostly single black mothers! duh. All this silly, useless rhetoric criticizing the black Church for something that is out of its control is ridiculous and foolishness. Regarding so called church pimps, as with any organization, there are mostly good apples and a few bad apples. The godless media focuses on the few bad apples and blow them out of proportion. Those black ministers who use their position in church to pay prostitutes for services should be ashamed. But I give them some credit for this: at least they know enough to do that mess away from the church instead of promoting fornication in the church. These days we have evil ones who promote all kinds of evil boldly.

    • DaTruth Reply

      July 28, 2012 at 10:18 am

      Yeah, this happens all the time. The church does have its problems, crooked greedy preachers and such but to blame the church for women being single is totally ridiculous. Many women like this can only blame themselves. I see this all the time, black women who made bad life choices when they were young by lusting after trifling/thuggish black men and ended up having a boat load of kids out of wedlock and baggage are trying to get a good man now. You just can’t blame the church for this

  18. kimberly Reply

    July 27, 2012 at 9:02 pm

    I have God with me all the time.I don’t need some institution to go to on Sundays…put my hard working money in a basket never really knowing where the funds are going and dealing with this type of shady madness happening under the so called God’s house…I’m Cool.

    • Anita Reply

      July 28, 2012 at 11:01 am

      Cool is cool but one day you might need family. It never hurts to have a church family. It is such a great feeling . . . that family love. It does not matter if you have a real family but a church family is really special. Did you grow up in the church? What makes you now feel you don’t need it. Do you think those ministers on TV know your name? It’s nice to be apart of a group of people that care about you. Peace. . .

  19. freeze Reply

    July 27, 2012 at 9:17 pm

    I can believe what the women are saying are true. Those in power are using women for their convience and no one seem to believe what a prositute have to say. I can vouch that this is true b/c I know of a few that have done these things.

  20. MillieG1 Reply

    July 27, 2012 at 9:48 pm

    Pastor’s, ordained minister’s, priests, clerymen, deacon & deconess’s are people like everyone else therefore they are not infallible and capable of sin, adultry and temptation. No one is exempt from allowing themselves to become captured in the throwes of lust and passion, ignoring and neglecting responsibilities,spouses, children, jobs, church obligations,friends, etc,.. Many people allow themselves to become divided by education, salaries, careers, sex, clothes/shoes/and jewelery often forgetting the vital aspect of fellowshipping and coming together as one. Often the church has been used as a place to socialize and congregate when trying to find husband and wife prospects. Rational and logical thinking is prevelant in all areas of our lives and attending a church does not exclude one from thinking and acting rationally and decisively. Historically the church has been a prominant place for African Americans to unite, pray and plan for a better and productive future and many historical decisions have been made and changed hisory amongst African Americans and color and people of color.

  21. dontgotothefemacamp Reply

    July 27, 2012 at 10:11 pm

    SLAVE CHURCH CHURCH SLAVES

    brings new meaning to the phrase”THE SECOND COMING”lol.lol

    WHO WOULD JESUS SLEEP WITH?

    LOL

  22. head Reply

    July 27, 2012 at 10:50 pm

    Well spoken DERRICK Well spoken my BROTHER! BROTHER TORREREESE I hear you too 4sho yall keeping it REALLLLL. Also,thanks SISTER DEB for your comments on your book because I been to numerous libraries and even tried to get the to order it and they said it wasn’t listed yet. They even checked the web and said it was only for sale at the present time. Thanks

  23. crmel79 Reply

    July 28, 2012 at 8:16 am

    Well said MillieG! Everyone has their own issues. Everyone will have to answer 4 their actions n this life, even you so y throw stones.Why run away from God because of someone elses life? Grow up in Christ.

  24. DaTruth Reply

    July 28, 2012 at 9:59 am

    What these church people are doing is obviously wrong, they need to get themselves right. But I’ve never understood how the black church keeps women single, its just common sense for anyone, male or female, to look for and find a good mate/spouse. If the church is telling black women to stay away from trifling sorry men well that is good advice. The same goes for men who should stay away from sorry women. It seems that this nothing but another excuse black women made up to blame others for their issues.

  25. vickie Reply

    July 28, 2012 at 11:21 am

    liquor,gambling,lottery used to be against the law now its legal. preacher’s want sex too sex should be legal

    • Nate Reply

      July 28, 2012 at 7:08 pm

      Gods” law forbids sex outside of marriage and all violate must anawer to him.

  26. jstep Reply

    July 28, 2012 at 12:41 pm

    The problem that the church has is having people understand that the church is the people who form the body; leaning on each other as we try to be more like Christ. Flawed human beings; some striving for perfection, while others think that it is okay to display a form of godliness—denying the conversion and supernatural reality of God and the reality of his life-changing presence. We are all mixed in the building together but none of us define God…it is God who defines us, if we let him.

  27. Victor Imeh Okuku Reply

    July 28, 2012 at 7:59 pm

    Mailing from Nigeria in Africa. Please my fellow black brothers and sisters, please whatever human being does shouldn’t stop you from having cordia relationship with God. Just pick the right words, do the right thing and leave the rest for God to judge. Or you look for a true church of God to worship. What you guys are experiencing in America is what we are experiencing here in Nigeria. What you should know is that the Devil is working tirelessly to take many people to Hell, that is why you guys are experiencing this temptation in churches. Just keepon praying for the preachers and church of God for true salvation. Have a nice day and love you all.

  28. Shawgrad Reply

    July 29, 2012 at 2:17 pm

    Anyone who knows the word of God knows that there is a Church within the Church so you have those who have been truly called by God and those who are apostates and Jesus said that the wheat and tares grow up together and the reapers will separate them when the time comes the sad part about it is some of these tares are in leadership but please don’t let stories like this turn you away from God because God made the Church for a reason FOR SINNERS everyone there is a work in progress and at the end of the day the enemy wants these stories in the spotlight so ppl can continue to make excuses about why they won’t get saved and become a part of the body of Christ. If you don’t give your life to Christ you will be eternally lost. Regardless of what you think. Be Blessed!

  29. Games Reply

    October 25, 2012 at 5:22 am

    My bгother reсommenԁed I may liκе this blοg.
    Не useԁ to be totallу right.

    This publiѕh truly mаde my day. You cаnn’t consider just how much time I had spent for this information! Thank you!

  30. Alexis Reply

    December 2, 2012 at 1:41 pm

    I will be purchasing the book for my library. I have only heard of the book. People we can read the book, but everyone has their own prospective, which is fine. I want to see how this book can help my clients. When I find something that I believe could be of good use to others I want to pass that on

    Alexis
    Licensed Chemical Dependency Counselor

  31. Timothy Wayne George Reply

    July 9, 2013 at 9:28 pm

    After reading the comments, some are on point, and others are not. We are in spiritual warfare, and the battle is between: The world, the flesh, and the Devil. We must put on the whole armor of God so that we can stand against all the wiles of the Devil. Marriage is under attack, and we must promote holiness, righteousness, and judgment. Jesus is coming back for a Bride without spot or blemish. The Church is the Bride of Christ, and He purchased her with His Blood on the cross. Let the blood of Jesus wash you from your former sins, and walk in newness of life in Jesus Christ. If any man be in Christ Jesus he is a new creation. The old way of life is gone, and the new man is created in Christ Jesus. The Lord does not intend everyone to be married. Some are to be celibates so that they can advance the gospel of Jesus Christ. So walk in unity, and have no confidence in the flesh. The weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strongholds. May the Lord bless you all my beloved.

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